Subject: Settling Down
Most people I know are settled down – whether it’s in their role of parent, wife, teacher, husband, Sycamore resident, etc. I am definitely not one of those people. And honestly, the idea of settling is a bit unnerving; it’s committing to something or somewhere or someone for forever. Since I left for college at 18, I have yet to find a place to call my own or a man to call my own – mine forever. Despite it being a bit scary, settling down is the recurring thought that permeates my before-sleep-thoughts and my dreams. I picture my life in the future while waiting for sleep to come and it always involves me being in love or married and with the perfect job.
I don’t think I’m scared to settle down, I think it’s unnerving because it’s something I’m afraid I’ll never get. Yes, I know most of you reading this are rolling your eyes at my pessimism and having your fingers prepped to say, “Of course you’ll fall in love with a place and with someone!” But my roving mind has yet to find a place that feels right for me or a guy who likes me more than I like him. In less than a month, I’ll be 29 and in those 29 years I’ve lived a blessed and happy existence. When I think about major complaints regarding the last 3 decades, I don’t have very many…except for the fact that I’m ready to fall in love with a town and with a guy. I’m ready…the open door is here and I’m ready. Without a concrete future life plan, now is the perfect time. Maybe I had to live my great life and give my wandering eye and wandering brain some attention before I knew that I was ready.
So, universe, I’m putting it out there to you: help me find my next step. Help me find who’s right and where’s right so this happy existence can continue while settling down (not settling). No more floating, no more roaming, I’m ready to be brought home. I’ll help, I’ll do what I can to make the process easier, but some guiding words or flashing neon signs would be nice too. Namaste universe.