Category Archives: Dating

Attachment Theory: I am Anxious

Growing up, I always knew I was a bit of an anxious person – I really cared about what my teachers, parents, and friends thought about me. I always wanted everything to be perfect, and luckily for me, I was pretty good at being pretty good. But when life didn’t go the way I’d planned, I was wracked with anxiety. Even had a few panic attacks back in the day. 

At the age of 36, I was still single. I had been going to a therapist to “talk it out” – what is so wrong with me that I can’t find someone to love me the way I deserve? My therapist would assure me that there was nothing wrong with me; I had a lot of really wonderful traits, as was evidenced by my many friendships, good jobs, and close relationship with my family. I had been going to see this therapist for six years, so I trusted that she knew me pretty darn well. 

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Love in the Time of COVID-19

Surprisingly, dating apps did help keep me sane during Shelter in Place. So, what happened when the world (kinda) opened back up, you ask? Read below to find out!

Guy #1: I talked with this guy for literally the entire time we were quarantined – from March 9 to the end of May. As soon as bars opened up for outdoor service, we met up for a couple of drinks. He was…nice. (Nice is code for boring.) But we were both a little rusty and decided to meet up again, this time for a Bruno walk. Walking the pup is a safe, quick, easy “date”. We honestly didn’t have much to say and neither of us tried very hard to keep in touch afterwards.

Guy #2: After dinner and drinks, we decided to keep the date going with a little walk and Italian ice. It was probably the best date I’ve had in quite some time (and I’m not just talking about quarantine time). We made plans to meet up again, but then he slowly started to fade away. Then…

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6 Things I’m Learning about Relationships from Owning a Dog

I am infamously bad at romantic relationship and/or I have had infamously unsuccessful romantic relationships. I don’t know what it is, but I just can’t seem to get it right. My (non-romantic) relationship with Bruno, the wonder dog, has been pretty darn successful, though. The past four months of dog ownership have been both challenging and super great. Bruno is seriously adorable and he loves me like crazy (can you say mama’s boy?!). Might I dare say, that I love Bruno more than any man I’ve ever dated???? I mean, how could you not with a face like this?


And even though he’s a dog and I’m a hooman, I think I’m learning quite a great deal about how to have a relationship with people, romantic or otherwise.

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New Dating App: Doggie Dating

I’ve considered posting in the dog groups I’m in on Facebook or Meetup if there are any single guys wanting to go on a doggie date with me – one where we both bring our dogs and see if all 4 of us are compatible. {Side note: If you couldn’t tell by the fact that I’m writing about a new dating app, my date on Sunday wasn’t so great: he was 10 minutes late, texting me AT the time we were supposed to meet that he was running late; we talked about the weather for a good 30 minutes; and I ended the date by saying, “I don’t go out past 9pm because that’s my dog’s bedtime” lol lol.}

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My Life in the Suburbs

I knew that when I moved to Oak Park, my life was going to be a tiny bit lonelier. While living in Chicago, my calendar was full with friends, volunteering, yoga, and dates (with dumb idiots).

  • By moving out to the *suburbs*, I realized that I’d see friends less since it’s a {rather small} trek.
  • I am no longer tutoring since it’s a {rather small} trek to get back home from the location.
  • Though I still teach yoga on Saturday mornings, it’s the only class I’m teaching at the moment. 
  • Yup, I’m still going on dumb dates with dumb idiots; in fact, the first one in a while is tonight (which probably means I should wait to post this so you can get the live update on how it went since I’m sure you’re waiting with baited breath on news of my dating life…). 

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The One-Hour First Date

I’m about to embark on my 4th first date in as many days, thanks in part to the great social experiment of 2018 (version 2.0).

First dates are exhausting, especially when you are definitely NOT a match with someone and you know within the first 5 seconds of meeting him. Not only is it the prep time before the date, but the date itself can last hours if you’re not careful. Side bar: This also means I’m advocating for setting up the first date ASAP so you’re not wasting too much time in anticipation.

One time, I was on a date with someone I really didn’t want to be on a date with (and to answer the question you’re probably asking: I thought I wanted to be on the date with him before the date, but not after we actually met and started talking #nofire). We had our obligatory one drink, and as soon as I took my last gulp, he asked if I wanted another round. I turned to the window and it immediately started pouring down rain. Buckets, I tell you! “Sure, I’ll stay for another!” It certainly gave him the wrong impression since he texted me afterwards asking for another date, but I had walked there and was potentially without an umbrella.

So, what if instead of me relenting, a giant buzzer had sounded after 1 hour? Like an extended speed date.

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