All posts by Ashley

Dating

Bruised and Broken up, but not Broken

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I woke up on a recent Friday morning inexplicably happy. A smile was permanently on my face from the time the alarm buzzed to the time I got home. I was terribly nice to every person who called me at work. I ended every email with a: Have a great weekend!

It’s hard to believe that this happiest of happy days was only 1 week after the boy-of-nearly-7-months and I had broken up. I was, in fact, happy that the relationship was over. The boy-of-nearly-7-months and I weren’t perfect matches. We tried fitting ourselves together like two mismatched puzzle pieces for the last 5 months of the relationship and it consistently ended up with a lopsided puzzle. I miss my partner in crime, but I don’t really miss the boy-of-nearly-7-months (though I do miss his dog a whole lot).

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Travel

Life Lessons from an Airbnb Host

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After a work training in New York, a colleague and I stayed for a quick 24 hours in NYC. I thought it would be fun, and potentially cheaper, to stay in an Airbnb so I chose one in Tribeca. The cost was fairly expensive for 1 night, but the description made it sound promising and the location was on-point. When we arrived, the host was eclectic and a little over the top, but nice enough. We weren’t at the place very long, but neither my colleague nor I were particularly impressed and stuck mostly to ourselves when we were in the loft. I don’t remember acting rude or grumpy, but apparently I’d made that impression on our funky little host:

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When I received this feedback, I was taken aback. Yes, I can be short/curt and not super open to new people, especially when the time investment is so short. I was exhausted from a week of intense full-on training. But was I rude? Was I grumpy? Was I brusque (according to Merriam-Webster: blunt in manner or speech often to the point of ungracious harshness)? I honestly don’t think so, but I came across that way to Reno.

Shortly after receiving this email, a friend randomly walked into the cafe where I was sitting. I was happy to see her, of course, but Reno’s feedback flashed bright lights in my brain: BE EXTRA SMILEY NOW. ACT HAPPY. DON’T BE GRUMPY…AT ALL.

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#RestaurantforTwo, Chicago

Restaurant for Two: Michael Jordan’s Steak House

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Did you know that May is National Burger Month? Michael Jordan’s Steak House in River North is celebrating! With 31 different burgers – 1 for each day of the month – you can try at least a few more burgers before month’s end.

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While the 3 burgers I ate have already passed their “special day”, you’re lucky enough that they are staple menu items that’ll be featured on a rotating basis. No matter when you go or what burger you order, the meat patty will be juicy and cooked with just the right amount of pink. You’ll see mini burgers in my pics since I was here for a review, but you’ll get the real deal when you order.

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Travel

Bakery Walk: Lower Manhattan

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My colleague and I were only in NYC for 24 hours after a training in upstate, so I reached out to my women’s travel Facebook groups (feel free to ask me and I’ll invite you to the groups) and requested suggestions for bakeries, cafes, and restaurants. These ladies showed up! With so many awesome suggestions, we decided to do a Bakery Walk – Lower Manhattan style.

Once Upon a Tart

The streets of New York City are lined with restaurants and cafes that I think you could go to a new place every day for the rest of your life and never repeat. I was happy to have received so many suggestions so our choices could be narrowed, though I’m sure that if we’d just seen Once Upon a Tart while walking past, we would’ve stopped in no matter what. As you can see by the pictures, this place is adorable. Our barista was lovely and that chocolate chip cookie was snarfed in 2.5 seconds.

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Living Life and Yoga, Too

My Dream: Hygge

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From a young age I assumed my life would go the traditional route: meet a man, fall in deep, passionate love, get married, buy a house with a picket fence and a blooming garden, have babies, live happily ever after. When my life didn’t exactly work out that way, I started dreaming more broadly.

For starters, I wanted to move to Asia. I’d been there in college and had *that* feeling when I was traveling around China; I knew I’d live there again. So, I did it. I researched, I day-dreamed – a lot – and moved to Hong Kong.

Then when I was in Hong Kong and my “get married and have a baby” dream wasn’t coming any closer to fruition, I dreamed up a new dream: at the age of 35 if I was no closer to having a family, I would move abroad again. I’d always been interested in joining the Peace Corps, I wanted to learn Spanish, I’d like to see more of South America, etc. The possibilities were endless.

Recently, though, that “move abroad again” dream faded. I like living in Chicago. I love my job. I love my new yoga gig. My family is close. My life is here and I’m not ready to leave – even if 35 is 1.5 years away. As the “move abroad again” dream receded, a new dream formed:

Own a tea shop & yoga studio

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Dating

Let Go and Let God

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“Let Go and Let God”

It’s certainly not an expression you’d ever hear me say, let alone believe, yet when a friend wrote about it in a recent blog post, it stuck with me. Not because I believe that God is doing anything for me, but because sometimes I really do need to let go and let life happen as it happens.

The guy I’m dating may soon be the guy I dated. We had “the talk” last night and agreed to meet up this weekend to discuss where we see our relationship going. I don’t have high hopes. For the last 24 hours, I’ve been nervously chewing over every little thing about him, about us, about me, about my future, about…you get the point. I can’t sleep, I can’t eat, I can’t do anything other than think about the fact that I may be single very soon and if that’s something I actually want (because, admittedly, it might be something that I want even though it terrifies me).

My brain hurts. My heart hurts. My eyeballs hurt. And, while I can’t physically eat a giant cupcake or guzzle a glass of wine right now, I can Let Go and Let God or more appropriately for me – let go. I don’t have to decide today, tomorrow, or next week who I’m going to marry, if I should have a baby by myself, if I should adopt a kid, or if I should move to Seattle to start fresh. Instead, today, tomorrow, and next week, I need to take part in some self-love in order to let go.