My Foray into Online Dating

Part One (it’s only been 2 weeks, and I’m sure there are more adventures to come after this posting)

Except for first dates (because those make me want to throw up), I in general like dating. Getting to know someone, talking a lot about yourself, and going to free dinners are all bonuses to dating. Since I’m new to Chicago, I decided that I needed to get myself out there in the dating world. I’m sick of meeting guys at the bar – I know, I know, I drink, too, so it’s not that strange to meet a “normal” guy at a bar, but every guy I’ve met at a bar has a commitment-phobia that I like to call “scared to sleep with only one person”.

So, in the spirit of trying new things, I recently went on a Grouper – it’s an online dating service where, based off of your Facebook profile, you’re set up on a date with someone. You bring friends, they bring friends, and it’s a group date (get it? grouper?). The average age of the guys was 23 and they still had peach fuzz on their chins; the average age of us girls was 30. You can guess where that ended up! Well, actually, you probably can’t… They paid for our drinks, then ditched us, not meeting us at the next bar that they asked us to go to. I’m sure they got a riotous laugh all the way to their mom and dad’s house.

A couple of girlfriends and I went to a singles’ mixer, and ended up meeting two cool girls who we spent the night eating dinner and laughing with over the quality of guys in attendance. Oh, and I also flirted it up with the bartender who was left my number on a coaster – and not by me. He texted, I didn’t meet up with him because I was nervous, ugh. I also considered speed dating, but freaked out and signed up too late, so instead ended up on a waiting list, got off said list, and didn’t try to get in. I was scared, what can I say?!

So…that leaves me with the very brave act of making myself a profile on OKCupid (and, no, you cannot find out my username). It’s actually been fun not responding to idiots who write things like:

*hello, you are such a beautiful woman….how come you are not taken? I spilled my cup of Coffee on my laptop just because I was taking a closer look on your pics…….well i got it dried anyway.. How are you doing??? In a relationship what matters most is a true and honest man who will treat you right. I seek my soul mate, i am ready to treat you as my queen and princess, be your knight in shinning amor…My name is Denis Maillet, I am a very God fearing man and needs a woman as such that is why I contacted you no matter the distance between us, God will bring our heart desire to past. I am man who has dedicated his life in helping people who are in need and doing charity.Hope to hear from you

*Hello. Cupid called. He says to tell you that he needs my heart back. You have beautiful eyes:)

Needless to say, these freaks did not get a message in return. I did, however, exchange numbers and have a couple of dates already:

Date #1: A nice, home-grown kinda guy. Lives 15 minutes from his parents and has only ever been to Mexico and beach resorts. He was polite and we had a good enough chat, but in the end, he was entirely too white bread for me. When I explained where Korea was, he said, “Oh yea, the Vietnam War!”

Date #2: A construction worker with a child. I’m not wholly opposed to dating guys with kids because I’m nearing 30, but if you’re not the whole package, it isn’t worth it to me. He fidgeted a lot and I’m guessing that’s because it was 5:30pm and he was drinking an extra tall coffee. Relax off the caffeine. I texted him afterward telling him that I wasn’t sure we were compatible. He apologized for being a douche.

Date #3: This guy texted me that afternoon and made a plan…2 hours before we were meant to meet up, he cancelled and asked for a rain check. Before almost every first date I have, I try to cancel and think of every excuse not to go on the date. I’m guessing he did the same, but I’m also assuming that I’ll never meet him in person to find out since he didn’t ask for another day.

Dates 4 and 5 are this week, so fingers crossed for no disasters and that I can actually meet a quality guy that I want to date. And, if he can be a traveler who’s smart and can spell that would be a plus.

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