What it Feels like to Date a Nice Guy

Harry* and I met less than a month ago. After our first date, I texted my girlfriends: “For reals, best first date ever.” After dim sum and bubble tea, we checked out the new library in Chinatown: #booknerdsunite.

For our second date, he bought tickets – in advance, mind you – for Second City.

I found out that my friend Joe had passed away right before meeting up with Harry for our third date. I was a wreck, but Harry was already at the restaurant and I didn’t want to be rude. At the end of the date, he hugged me and told me that it was okay to be sad and that if I needed to cry right then and there, I could.

He’s made me dinner, we’ve gone for hot chocolate because “the warm milk will help you sleep”, he bought tickets for us to go see a concert for a country band he’d never heard of because he assumed I liked them. He even bought me fancy jewelry “just because”. Note: I’ve also paid for plenty of things. It isn’t because he buys me things or pays for stuff; it’s his thoughtfulness that’s the true measure.

All of this sounds too good to be true, right? It sort of feels that way. Like I’m living in a dream world. I’ve dated so many – to put it into one succinct word –  selfish men in the past, that I actually feel bewildered. Is this what it feels like to date a nice guy?????

We really do have the best time together. He’s funny, sexy, thoughtful, nice to everyone, quirky, well-traveled, and 100% nerd. So why am I feeling scared? Is it because he’s too nice? He claims that he just likes me and really wants to spend time with me. My friends tell me to just roll with it and embrace that someone actually likes me. It’s a strange feeling because I honestly don’t know that I’ve ever had this happen before, or at least not in a long time.

So, here I go, allowing this nice guy to be nice to me. I might be awkward, like a baby bird learning to fly, but I’m pretty sure I can used to being treated well.

*not his real name

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