I started watching Sex and City again. This time, from the very beginning. Season 1 Episode 1. 2018 marks the 20th anniversary. And while the characters don’t have cell phones, Facebook, or constant contact with their “friends”, it’s quite interesting how much we have in common: in both eras women just want to find love, but the men out there are slim pickings.

This past weekend, my grandparents, parents and I were watching some home movies. Everyone was so happy in the movies. Both my grandparents and parents laughed at the fun they were having with all of their kids. The VHS recordings made me want to have children even more than my little eggs and hormones already tell me I do. I want that same happiness my family had and still has. Someday, I want to have my own home movies to watch with my children and grandchildren.

Instead, I’m stuck in this single’s twilight zone where the only question the guys I meet ask is, “You wanna hang?” [and by hang, they mean have sex] I recently had a guy tell me he didn’t want a relationship one second after asking if I wanted to get together for the very first time. Um, well, I don’t want a relationship with you either, bud, but a drink doesn’t count as a relationship. He just wanted to “have fun, ya know” [you guessed it, code words for just have sex]

So while I’m watching these home movies, my ovaries are exploding. If a guy was watching his family’s home movies, why doesn’t he feel that way, too? Dating to men – both in 1998 and 2018 – seems to be about a quick(ie) fix. Don’t men want to make home movies and rewatch them 20 and 60 years later, and then see how loved and lucky they were??

And I am certain there are Skippers (open up your HBO Go app and watch the first episode if you’re confused) out there wanting to bust out their video camera and record their children opening presents at Christmas and at birthday parties. Are these men all taken? Or are they hidden incognito swimming in a sea of idiots? Why oh why was love so hard to find in 1998 and why oh why is love so hard to find in 2018?